We were never meant to die.

The glorious resurrection of Jesus confirms this, but the opening scenes from the book of Genesis also confirm this statement. When God creates, there is a forever guarantee, and while this is really good news, the simple truth is we all will face physical death someday. We will face it personally or through the life of a loved one or close friend. 

Then, it hits us seemingly out of nowhere — grief. Grief is our human response to loss.  What we discover is the grief is like one of my old cars.

For a short time, I drove a 1971 Chevy Caprice Classic. It was old, huge and was a seven cylinder. You see, one cylinder misfired pretty bad, which made the ride rather clunky. This is how it is when we are grieving. We are living, but our lives are running kind of rough.   

As difficult as the grieving process often is, over the years, I have noticed a growing trend that seems to side-step how we process the death of a loved one. More and more, we read, “at the request of [deceased person’s name], no services will be held.”     

On the surface, honoring the request of the deceased seems like an “honorable” thing to do, except for one major problem: funerals, home goings, celebrations of life and memorials are for the LIVING! Because we are human beings and grieving is unpredictable business, we need a sense of finality about death. To short-circuit this process can invite a prolonged and potentially more difficult process of grieving.

My appeal to you is to consider thinking a little more deeply about the impact of the death of a loved one or friend. Instead of making decisions based on finances or expediency (I know these are sensitive issues and realities), what if we asked, “How can we make this difficult process better?” One suggestion would be to seek out the helpful professionals at one of our local funeral homes. Another idea would be to talk to a local pastor, or your pastor if you are part of a church. 

If you are one of the few who has pre-arranged funeral plans and have requested “no services” or a small gathering for immediate family only, perhaps you would reconsider the impact on your family and friends. Are your plans going to help people walk through the grief process better, or are you expressing what you desire? This is a tough question for many of us, but my hope is that we can begin to open up some meaningful conversations with our loved ones and friends on this topic.    

For those who are fearful of death or perhaps even talking about it, there is hope. Jesus Christ has provided the way to a life that can begin today, and does not stop at physical death.   Jesus shared, “I am the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6).” 

Seek Him today!

Greg Rensberry is the pastor of Mapleview Free Methodist Church in Niles. He can be reached at gregrensberry@yahoo.com