By Staff
As parents of teenagers know, the rite of passage of their child becoming a driver isn't easy.
Along with the increased insurance costs, there is constant worry. Will they drive too fast, not pay attention, cause an accident?
On the other hand, these very same parents may find themselves faced with a different kind of worry - whether they should take the car keys away from their own adult parents.
In her 80s, my mother was quite confident in her 1977 Cutlass Supreme. She mainly went to the grocery store once a week and to her hairdresser every few months or so. She was able to walk across the street to church and she had decided we all lived too far for her to travel alone.
In Illinois she was forced to take a driving test, along with an eye exam every year after she turned 80.
I went with her when she was 86. She actually took the test on a six lane road by the busy mall Woodfield. I couldn't believe it, but she said she was more comfortable in her normal surroundings. She passed.
The next few years she was becoming concerned as to how we would curb her, should we feel it was necessary.
Somehow she came to the conclusion herself it was time to turn in her keys and we didn't have to make it into a traumatic moment. She died at 89 and a half, still with a sound mind.
I was reminded of the difference in state laws when a friend's father gave his family a scare this weekend.
Also in his 80s, he usually made a short round trip from his home in Roseland to a restaurant every night. Coming out of the parking lot on Saturday, following the Notre Dame game, he must have been misdirected by the police onto the tollroad.
Four hours later, when he hadn't yet shown, his sons frantic with worry called the sheriff, police and hospitals.
He was found, okay, in LaGrange, Ind. by a young couple after he had run out of gas.
His normal five minute trip had turned into something quite different as his routine was disrupted.
Did he realize he should get off at Mishawaka and turn around to come back home? Apparently not.
Teens can be a worry on the road, but concern should also be for those who though they have had lots of experience, just aren't at the top of their game any longer.
Making the decision to stop driving isn't always as easy as it was in the case of my mom, her making the decision herself.
Often intervention is necessary. Taking away their independence is possibly one of the hardest things an adult child must do for their parent. But often it must be done.
Just like the restrictions we place on our teenage drivers, don't expect to be thanked when either nighttime driving is off limits for our parent, or driving altogether. But do it anyway.