By By KATHIE HEMPEL / Niles Daily Star
NILES – "I can't find her. My child is gone."
This is the kind of call police, mall security and neighbors dread. A Niles mother knows the horror of a child wandering off, all too well.
Her son, 4, was discovered behind a tanning bed inside Rana's Hair Fashions, 525 N. 17th St., several blocks from their Howard Avenue home, just this week.
"The little boy seemed to be at the curious stage. He wants to be out exploring the world around him," Sheriff Paul Bailey said.
Chief Larry Lamb of the Niles Fire Department quickly divided the area into grids, to search for the missing child.
The police report said that the child had recently taken to exploring his neighborhood and in particular, to visiting a local beauty salon/tanning parlor. So this was where his mother began her search. Employees at the salon, who had sent, or taken the boy home, three previous times, had not seen him enter the shop.
After driving around the neighborhood for 30 minutes, his mother finally called the police.
A number of firefighters and other emergency personnel were able to assemble quickly, as at the time of the disappearance they were at the Niles Pizza Hut for a fundraiser.
What is the right thing to do? How long do you wait to call police? How do you get a child, fascinated by the world around them, to understand how important it is to stay close and in touch without causing unnecessary fear?
According the Center to Prevent Lost Children, 90 percent of families will experience losing a child in a public place such as a mall, amusement park, beach or airport. Another seven out of 10 kids get lost at least once. Ninety-five percent remember the traumatic experience forever.
An October 2002 US Department of Justice report states that every year 374,700 children become temporarily separated from their caretakers for at least one hour. That's 1,025 kids each day.
Unfortunately, these statistics represent only the incidents that are reported to authorities. If it hasn't happened to your family yet, chances are it will.
Here are a few of the hints offered at www.preventinglostchildren.org:
Keep Calm. When a parent realizes that his or her child is missing, a typical reaction is to scream out the child's name; it actually might notify the wrong type of person that your child is lost and vulnerable. Odds are the child is just lost. Being smart and proactive can help you find your child quickly and unharmed.
Be prepared. The best thing you can do is prepare your child with an effective way to identify himself or herself. Safe identification provides contact information to reach you while you are mobile. A cell phone is perfect because it doesn't provide information that can lead a stranger to the child's home or school.
Dress children in bright yellow or green clothing: To spot children easily, dress them in very brightly colored clothing; lemon yellow or lime green are best. This gives parents a "third eye" so that they can quickly spot these unusual colors in a crowd, even at a distance. The clothing can be a T-shirt, hat, or jacket.
Carry a recent photo and description: Always carry a recent, head-and-shoulders, color photo of each of your children. On the back of each photo, write down the child's eye and hair color, height, weight, and birthmarks or other distinguishing characteristics. Be sure to note if the child has special needs and if he or she is one of identical multiples. Include your cell number, too.
Many public places such as retail stores, amusement parks, and beaches, follow specific procedures (such as lock downs) when a child is missing. Try to research the lost child procedures of your destination beforehand. If your child gets lost, quickly find an authority or employee to trigger the venue's lost-child procedures.
Don't wander too far while you look for your child-she may be nearby. Most importantly, make sure that the cell phone or pager number noted on your child's safe ID is turned on and receiving a signal.
Police departments say that if for any moment you feel that your child is in danger, call 911. They agree that it is better to call the police back a moment later to report that you've found your child than to later regret waiting valuable minutes. Every moment can dramatically affect the outcome of finding your child.
Once you are reunited with your child, congratulate him for following your emergency instructions and don't yell at him for getting lost. Celebrate that you are together because of his smart and brave actions. This helps ensure that if your little one gets lost again, he will focus on getting back to you rather than remain intentionally lost in fear that you'll yell at him.
When the trauma has subsided, discuss the incident and recall how you both felt. Reiterate that you are proud he was able to act correctly and get back to you quickly and safely. If he did not act correctly, remind him what to do next time and be sure to role-play finding other mommies and asking for help.
Children do wander off; it is not a result of bad parenting or bad children. But as good parents, we can be proactive and avoid, or at least minimize, profound trauma and possible physical harm. Whether you are at a local mall, where statistics say that 45 percent of the children lost are reported, or on vacation, all children can use assistance to help find their parents should they get lost.
The Center to Prevent Lost Children was just founded by a child safety expert from Boston in 2007. After four years of research, she wanted to find a way to make the general public aware and proactive when it came to preventing children getting lost.